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Phoenix is usually pretty careful not to let our geeks see
the light of day, as it hurts their eyes & scares the heck out of our much
beloved, but totally unsuspecting clients.
Until recently, most of our geeks felt that exposing them to
public scrutiny was grounds for terminating their contract immediately, followed
by months of swilling beer, eating Twinkies, playing computer games and in
general just lying about until the unemployment ran out and they were forced to
once again seek gainful employment...
But recently, inspired by a combination of threats and
cajolery, several of them volunteered to post data about themselves on our
website.
Below, you have their strange, sad stories. As you read them,
you'll be tempted to say to yourself, "There but for the grace of God, Go I!"
You're still young, there's plenty of time...
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Patrick Slavens
As Patrick is currently living under
the Federal Witness Protection Program, we are unable to provide
any information regarding his daily (9-5) routine at Phoenix,
his new home at 2233 Wenton Ave, or his shiny new Dodge parked
out in our front lot every day...
Pat's safety comes first, after all... |
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John Petterle
John Petterle, our resident Sales
Manager and CallWare Guru, is back from his adventure.
A clash with space pirates in Whutupian
space made the trip somewhat harrowing, but John loved the new
lightx10 cruiseship & brings back shiny new skills - among
them installing Callware, yodelling, and making a fiery hot burrito. |
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Paul Kadlec
At long last, Paul graces the "Meet
the Geeks" page with his presence!
Although he fought desperately to
avoid inclusion, the knowledge that he either posed willingly
or we broke into the restroom with the cam and caught him on
the toilet brought him right around! |
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Sir Kelvin of the
Networks
Kelvin Klassy's definitely the kind
of man you want chasing down your network bugs...
Big, strong, hairy - a lean, mean
network butt-kicking machine if there ever was one.
Ed. Note: Kelvin, you owe me big-time
for this one... |
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Herb (Keeper
of the Clowns) L.
I'd hoped to provide our surfers with a frontal shot of
the Clown-Keeper, but alas! Even this shot was enough to
allow many of our employees (none of whom
had ever actually seen him) to track him down demanding
paychecks, raises, pats on the back and generally make his life
hard.
Thus the privacy strip across his face. Sorry! |
Thanks Fish.
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